From: jwgh@earthlink.net (Jacob Haller)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: FTSD: Language Blues
Date: Tue, 1 Dec 1998 22:48:45 -0500
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[Sung to the tune of whatever works for you.  An approximation to
Memphis Minnie's 'Nothing in Rambling' should work OK.]

I've learned so many languages
        I really feel quite learned
But if I every try to use them
        I consistantly get burned
        
REFRAIN:
I've got the language blues
        Makes me so sad and confused
                Can't tell my direita from my esquerdo
        I just can't shake these language blues.


Perhaps I get them mixed up
        Would that be such a shock?
Do you know if "guten abend"
        really translates as "let's rock?"

[REFRAIN]

Now when I speak in Spanish
        I'm as conf'dent as can be
So when I say "Lo voy a matar"
        Why do people avoid me?

[REFRAIN]

I'll say when wooing French belles:
        "Direz-moi, que pensez-vous
De la situation mondiale"
        When I just mean "I love you"

[REFRAIN]

        [kazoo solo]

"Soy capitán" if you get me
        (but I kind of doubt you do)
Mon pamplemousse est noir et blanc
        So if you can help me, please do

REFRAIN:
I've got the language blues
        Makes me so sad and confused
                Can't tell my cul from my oreilles
        I just can't shake these language blues.
============================================

-jwgh
-- 
"Sort of makes you long for the days when humanity was just one simple
little button push away from nuclear devastation, doesn't it?"
         - Gary Cooper, alt.tech-support.recovery 9/20/96